The black receiver in my grandfather's house

Telephone, telephone,
riddle of the ringtone,
the numbers make no sense.

Apparently a tool I use,
I confuse -
user and tool.

Telephone, telephone,
riddle of the ringtone,
wire on a millstone, 
round around my neck.

The earpiece, the mouthpiece,
always the same piece
lying in my hand.

Welded to a heart of bone,
while my fingers grip around
it has me -
spellbound.

Clubfoot, clubfoot
banging at my ear,
to put it down, to put it down
every time I wish,
impossible to kill it is,
recurrent dish - of fish. 

The mouthpiece sputters, spits and hits
(in backwards running time)
the dumb, the numb, the muted bum,
my face, my mouth and me.

2008-04-14

False

Two equalled one 
when I saw her again,
one equalled nil
when she made me wait
which made me hate
that one.

2011-01-17

No!

No, no, I cannot say no, 
no, you will go
if I say no. 
No, no, no,
please don't leave me, no,
I won't ever say no
any more.
I will do as you say,
HATE you, too, every day
because you
make me do
what I don't want to do!  
I know you don't know 
that I want to say no
'cause I cannot say no,
'cause I don't even know 
that I want to say no,
'cause you'll send me away
if I dare. 

2008-02-18, revised 2010-09-07

Congratulations

Apparently friendly mysterious creature 
that thought I might in the meantime 
have become normal enough 
to attach importance to birthdays. 
And mine.

Disappointed there she realized that 
I hadn't become less unstable and 
nobody could treat me with enough 
circumspection except 
therapists.

I know she knows I mostly don't know 
what's real. I never realized but now 
seem to hear her saying the same things 
since years past and suddenly know
that I never liked it; 

but can't avoid accepting the chocolates 
nor seem to escape the casual embrace.

2011-10-19