der Stachel

bitte 
sag mir 
wer du bist 
Tier vor der Tür 
polterst mich wach
lautlos abwesend grausam 
ich schlage nach dir weiß nicht 
hast du ein fremdes Gesicht oder nicht 
vielleicht ein geliebtes aber das existiert nirgendwo 
dafür droht hinter dir eine flüchtige Eminenz 
die sagt wer geliebt werden will muss
in der Anspannung eines Sprinters 
den rätselhaften Startschuß 
erwarten, der niemals 
kommt solange 
mein Herz 
klopft

			1997-08-22

friend equals foe

I'm meeting with a friend
and thinking, greedily thinking: friend
having already lost myself in
thinking nothing but: friend.

Is then a friend a misfortune?
Yes.
I must, must focus
on recalling that I exist.

Opening the mailbox,
hoping to find it empty,
dismayed because it is empty,
scared that I may have been abandoned already.

2010-01-04

Trust

With conviction you tell me
untrue impossible things
I grow quite confused, there is
no choice:
I must trust you.

Do you love me?
I love your 
solicitude.
Questions asked.
Sweat
I notice
contradictions.
It seems
you don't trust me.
I know I'm right, but you 
must be.
No one believes me,
I fear

You doubt me, accuse me,
I know that                      
confict is lethal.
My wellbeing I must 
abandon.
You say that 
a good thing
is too good for me.
I can't call that brazen,
I must adjust.            
I must trust - to adjust.

Pain.
You promise palliation.
I trust
I love you.
Break it
to make me hate you.
Promise anew,
I love you anew.
Of course I trust 
no one.

2006-12-11

Schlimmer

Jede Mutter, 
die ihr Kind nicht liebt,
muss ja so tun.

Das macht es schlimmer für das Kind.

2010-05-18