Ocean

The gaze of yonder calm blue eyes
belies a torrent of panic and cries
making no show of strength and strength
their power twinkling above the flood, 
no more hiding and running and blood.
The gaze of yonder calm blue eyes
proves direction above the waves,
above the fighting and tears of spite,
I suddenly gasp at  god's blue light.

1999-01-13

Meine Mutter war eine Terroristin
sie soff um sich nicht zu erinnern
dass nicht ich das Monster war
das ihr Vater war
den sie so liebte und bewunderte

2013-06-09

Stockholm Syndrome

Who am I, you or me?
Who threatens to throttle me?
Who shoots me below the neck?
Who is killing, you or me?
Who will be killing you?
With a blade below the throat
I am saying, you are saying,
we're the best of friends.
You or I is whooing me, 
I or you embracing, she
is a fat old hag.
I embrace her nonetheless,
he -
embraces me.
Knowing well, I play along
kissing where puking
wouldn't be wrong
fearing 
that old 'love' song.

2007-02-26

False

Two equalled one 
when I saw her again,
one equalled nil
when she made me wait
which made me hate
that one.

2011-01-17

Grabbed

The man I confused with my father
made me do things
I thought of as girl experiments
only when he grabbed me
and talked all crazy
as though I had harmed him
and didn't let go
did I recognize
my enemy

2013-09-18

man

hopelessly forging images
of yourself
a cool liar
you are
being right
punished for tentatively
being
what you'd like to appear like
how can I explain this
it seems that you must punish everyone
who
unlike you
still likes you

		27-4-01; 21-7-01