Nightmare Instructions

Bicycle, horse, rocket, tree.
Beware fascination.
He is the machine.	
Grammophone, auto, printer, elevator, meat.
Lid, purse, telephone.
Empty house.
Young man.
Little lamb.

Bumpy ride on the stairs,
to work, to school!
Good whore, small toilet,
fearing the examination.

I read, write, eat illegally
manuscript, book, the number three.
Silver, black, yellow, orange, green, red.
Cock and balls on the menu of acts.
Scratches in blue, I fear for my things.

Pacing, cycling, prisoner
on map, hilly body.
Single file, him behind,
moving periodically,
thumping stimulation.

Racing, chasing leaving trains,
suspended in mid-stride,
needing to cross the deadline to escape from death,
endangered in the intercourse of cars. 

Beware of bodies, 
breathing, football, screws,
of barrels, bottles, feet, cheese, keys and teeth,
of long, round, budding shapes, pieces of paper, fotos, little images,
of old wood, leather, rubber, mirror, baldness, hair  
and anything that grows,
of grass and trees,
of dog, cat, turtle, spiders, elephant's delight,
of olive, icecream, sweetness, presents, touch.

Denuded, moving house, exposed to gazes,
betrayed by teachers, actors actually,
abducted, abandoned I submit
Abuse declared illegal makes disgust legal.		
What was before disgust?
Fear.
Molestation.

Dropping from lifts, displaced from self,
an object spliced in many mes
observing it from high above.
Is there a victim - an attacker?
Is there a target of so-called desire?
Did I reverse the roles to avoid facing the truth?
Swap the respective actions?
Disperse, reallocate the properties of both?

Can I reverse the roles - 
expose the origin?

		2005-12 - 2007-11

Grabbed

The man I confused with my father
made me do things
I thought of as girl experiments
only when he grabbed me
and talked all crazy
as though I had harmed him
and didn't let go
did I recognize
my enemy

2013-09-18

Weil ihr mich nicht hört, spreche ich leise

Lächerlich,
unanständig,
befremdlich ist's
sich zu erinnern,
da die Vergangenheit doch umgeschrieben wurde.
Die Gegenwart wankt.


		2008-04-28

Kapitän Fragensteller:

Kennst du mich besser als ich mich selbst?
Welche Antwort steuerst du an?

2006-12-29